you hold onto things that were

“Growing up is never easy. You hold on to things that were. You wonder what’s to come. But that night, I think we knew it was time to let go of what had been, and look ahead to what would be. Other days. New days. Days to come. The thing is, we didn’t have to hate each other for getting older. We just had to forgive ourselves….for growing up.”

{the wonder years}

While in Zanoni for the night, Dad showed me some videos from when Morgan and I were little. One really stuck out.

In the scratchy, wobbly video, my dad’s parents took turns holding Morgan when she was a baby. Grandma cradled and patted and rubbed and kissed and snuggled baby Morgan in her peaceful, sweet, gentle way. Grandaddy sang silly songs and patted her leg after making funny faces and creating strange sounds. I wish I could have known them while they were that young and healthy. Watching the videos, I was laughing and loving seeing them. And then I became teary. Teary because my older sister is the only baby that I have ever seen my Grandmother hold and love on and that was still only on video. In the video Grandma was wearing the dress that she is most photographed in- a navy blue dress with white dots. She was a classy lady. Until today, I didn’t realize that I missed her so much.

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